3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
