His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
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