He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I'm really busy with my period
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