I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.