At least make sure they are 18
Why
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
