she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
