Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
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It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
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I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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