Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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