someone threw a dead crab at me
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
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