Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
