I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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