OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
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Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
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I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
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