I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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