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One girl and one boy is just not enough.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Randomize
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