need another drink. this is the easiest way
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?