this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize