can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Never underestimate the power of titties
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize