I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
this boner is exhausting
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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