I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
