You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize
