i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
either way he was missing a nipple.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
