I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
