I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
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