you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
