My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
My cat gives me a boner
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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