I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
