hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
