I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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