Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
