whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
