i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
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It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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