I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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