i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Randomize
