He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize