I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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