I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
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