I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
There r osticjed everywhere
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
