Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
But break dance skills will only take you so far
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
My vagina is very pro this idea
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