Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
