I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
