So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize