I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
