I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
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