I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
