I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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