Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize