so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
just tell him i said nine months
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Randomize
