i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
No subtext here. People are naked.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Randomize
