So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
