I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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