Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I wish life had little blips of pornography
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
