Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
