I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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