i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
