I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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