google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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